Drunk? Yup that's me!...

Okay so I went out for drinks after work with co-workers. We all had so much fun. What did I have? I had...

4 margaritas
2 shots of Jack
1 shot of Jaeger
And yes...I'm pretty much done!

I had him on the work premises. (Oh yea, let's call him GTS...because he acts like a Goody Two Shoes. Boy that was a long time coming.) I didn't reach my destination yet he did! (WTF!). But I told him he owes me and he knows it also. Anyways.. I needed to get drunk. I am on the train and I need some food. (Whoever planned today's night out, let's call him Mr. Know at All, Thank you very much!)

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If there is...

a loser-ville, "he" would be the president. "He" needs to get off that high horse and get over it!

I am pissed!

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Which One?

Is there a difference between kissing & having sex with someone? Of course, there is! Kissing is very intimate and sleeping with someone is less intimate. Or it can well be vice versa. It all depends on the individual...

Speaking of which one, while I'm on the topic, would like to talk about hate, loathe and resentment. Well, hate is pretty powerful word so sometimes I'd rather use dislike or loathe but then there is a RESENTMENT. Of all the words, I would like to use that word. I don't hate, loathe, or dislike, I RESENT HIM!

Months ago like 4 months, I would say I couldn't define my feelings on him or the situation but now they are all clear. I have this resentment towards him. He used to ask me if I hate him or saying things like you hate me, don't you. "No, I don't hate you. I resent you." Now that's the most defined feelings ever! Can you live with that?! And I am not hating. I am just me and this is the way I deal with things. Love it or love it more...it's me!

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Saying goodbye to a wonderful memory that will last forever...

It's been awhile since I've written. I have many things to write about but wasn't too sure how to word it. The last thing I want to do is make the words come out all scattered (just like the way I think, LOL).

Today, I feel the need to say goodbye to this wonderful part of my life. I am sad about it but there is not need for me to hang onto. Its always good to hold onto the memories that are good for your soul but I don't think holding onto this memory is good for me. I can't seem to let go of this person who has crossed my path. I tried many times and it keeps pulling me back. So this is kind of like my eulogy of my feelings for that individual. If I can't let go, I can't move on. Then I will be the only one who is stuck in the past. He does seems to be fine and moving on but I keep replaying things in my head and going back to what ifs.

So now I am saying goodbye to all the feelings that I have. I need to move on and I have to move on. It's not healthy for me. No more what ifs!!!